… but still like to know what is current and lively, may I recommend sitting down for twenty minutes in the Hanover Square branch of Pret at about 0930?

A lot of girls who have jobs at Conde Nast go in there to get their coffees and buns (I see you! I see you eating your fucking buns) before they go to “work”.

Anyway I saw one girl in a funny sort of kimono top, cropped black satin trousers and a pair of Adidas slides you know like the ones that Mark Zuckerburg is always slopping about in. And then in came Jo Elvin, who is the editor of Glamour magazine. She was wearing a dark red pant suit – pant suit being the funniest phrase in English at the moment – a matching bag, a pair of utterly hideous silver low block heeled sandals and a sort of Sherlock Holmes cape.

But what do I know?! I don’t even have an iPhone these days because Vodafone can’t get its fucking shit together. This explains the strange use of photographs at The Spike. But after ogling fashion people in Pret I went to get my hair cut by Nadia at John Frieda in Aldford Street,

Photo on 01-10-2015 at 12.29

who can do things with curling tongs that will make you wonder if maybe there is a God, and then on to Selfridges where I bought a new SLR camera to replace the one that was burgled right out of my kitchen a few months ago.

Coming soon!! Photos not taken on a Mac PhotoBooth or stolen off the internet.