While we’re on about magic creams, anyone who’s had a baby will be familiar with Lansinoh, which is a lanolin-based nipple cream that can turn your nips from mangled, shredded nubs – like raspberries that have been attacked by a cat – into something resembling a human body part.

It’s other purpose is as the world’s best lip balm – and shove some round your eyes before bed for good measure in the never-ending battle against shrinkling up into a dry old husk, bled dry by your immediate family just take, take taking all the bloody time!! Sorry – I’m a bit tired.

Lanolin is also the main ingredient in the purpose-made lip balm Lanolips, which is available in Boots, Waitrose and online. Lamolips lip balm and Eve Lom’s Kiss Mix are noteworthily better at their jobs than, say, Labello.

And now I see that Lanolips has a new body moisturiser out, which I intend to buy and apply to my hands each night before bed and, I dunno, maybe my feet? in a sort of shamanistic anti-ageing ritual. Wish me luck.

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