I am at a very particular stage – toilet-wise – with my son, who is 2.5.

I have attempted potty-training once or twice and it is clear that he vaguely knows what I mean, but isn’t quite there yet. His nursery doesn’t care if he’s not potty-trained yet and I don’t really care so I’ll wait until Spring.

Until then, when for some weeks leaving the house requires a bag containing a full change of clothes, a nose peg and a hip flask, we can go about our business, scuse the pun, packing only an emergency nappy change.

But I find toting about the necessary stuff annoying;  I want to trip about lightly with only a cross-body bag, not a stupid massive nappy change bag like I’ve still got a baby. So at the bottom of every bag there seems to be a scuffed nappy and sad half-empty pack of wipes. The wipes then get snatched away for some sort of spill or other emergency and then you forget to put them back and then you’re out and about and a beastly smell drifts over to your nostrils from the back of the car, and…

So I have come up with a system of packing a resealable freezer bag with one nappy folded over and a clutch of wipes sealed in another bag and a balled-up pair of surgical gloves and a nappy bag for good measure. I have packed up about five of these little grab-bags and have stashed one in every bag and one in the car with two spare in the house that I can toss to my husband as he wanders off with the kids without even a packet of tissues let alone the makings of a three course meal, crampons, a spare potty an Epi Pen and a mini DVD player and 30 CBeebies DVDs in case he has to go to A&E!!! Chuh men.

As you seal the final outer bag you can squeeze all the air out of it and it ends up being quite a small package and fits into one of my husband’s back jeans pockets, which is the only place is is willing to carry stuff when he takes the kids anywhere.

The nappies don’t get scuffed and fluffy, the wipes don’t get pinched for another job and the thing about a pair of surgical gloves is that they seem a preposterous overkill until you really need them – in which event you want to jump backwards in time and give your former self a big hug and a Twix to say thanks.