Look sorry to do this to you, but you are going to have to start thinking about what to wear come Spring, now. I know! Sorry, sorry.

And I’m even sorrier to tell you that the bloody slip dress is back! urgh. I wasn’t even able to wear a slip dress first time around and now? At 35 after two kids with my bosom all around there? And my mum tum?

Just fuck off. Just fuck right off.

But the other thing that I didn’t do last time round that I could do this time round is wearing a lace-trimmed camisole or a trimmed baby doll dress over jeans/leggings and underneath a sweater so that the silk and lace pokes out becomingly. It’s grunge – again.

Come Spring slip dresses and lace-trimmed whatsits are going to be absolutely everywhere but what I’m saying is: start thinking about it now. Start mentally adjusting to the idea. Look up pictures of Kate Moss wearing that see-through silver slip with her trainers on. Channel it.

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I mean, don’t buy this, because it’s too early and other, better examples will come along, but this is the sort of thing you ought to be thinking about when the time comes. Not to wear on its own, you understand, but with sweaters, tights, leggings, skinny jeans and bikers or other boots. Sort of like this:

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Bloody Breton stripes will still be around in Spring, says January’s Vogue, so that’s good as I’m sure you’ve all got 400 breton tops in your cupboard. If you don’t, Mango has one or two good striped sweatshirts and oversized t-shirts.

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I mean, they’ve styled this with the sensitivity of my two year old, but you get the idea.

And peach – peach and pale pink and sort of pale orange: those are the colours to look out for, which is a shame as I look ghastly in all of those.