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Mad Lady tutu skirt

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There is part of me that would like to go about looking like this all the time: to Waitrose, to fetch Sam from nursery, to get a coffee. There is within me – within us all – an hysteric on the verge of a nervous breakdown, whom I spend about 20% of my time trying to suppress. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t. CRY. You stupid crybaby! 

Anyway I enjoyed very much wearing this get-up for this photo as I am feeling more on the verge of a breakdown than my normal 20%. I had a catastrophic weekend. My husband and I are admirable when the other is ill – we pick up the slack, take the kids out, let the other go back to bed. But when we are both ill, which we were this weekend, everything collapses.

It was only a cold, but what a cold! The kind that gets right into your bones and fucks you up. Not flu! Just a cold. But a badass one.

So looking after the kids became nearly impossible to do outside as we were both so exhausted and drained. We staggered out in the mornings both days but then had to come home to recuperate, while the kids (mostly Sam, but also slightly Kitty) did that thing that small children do when confined to the house for 4 hours straight, which is to go barking mad.

Then my father rang: my mother was in hospital. A heart attack. Not dead! But she is in a hospital far away as she was visiting friends at the time and so I cannot see her. And I know she doesn’t like hospitals and is suspicious of doctors and operations: she will have to have a procedure at some point, I don’t know which one.

I am not worried, let me make that clear. I believe in medicine! But she doesn’t.

Then the child of a friend – a real proper friend, not an acquaintance – was admitted to hospital with suspected encephalitis. Look it up. Not a thing you want your kid, or anyone’s kid, to have.

My impacted wisdom tooth is also playing up, the gum is all swollen and painful – I can’t close my mouth properly. And as a little kick up the bum for afters, my second piercing is now infected.

I reacted to all of this news and to the challenges of cabin fever, the demands of my small children and my minor physical discomforts by going mental and screaming at everyone and being a total fucking bitch all weekend.

What better way to process everything after such a time than by putting on Mad Lady’s clothes; this tulle skirt from Rare, £39.00, and cut-out shoes (Comptoir des Cotonniers, about 2 years ago) and a huge coat. I’m not sure I can keep the skirt, really. It’s too mad, too “fashion” – you do have to be properly thin and hipless and neurotic to carry it off – and, as I said, those are all things that I’m trying my hardest to suppress.

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Comments

  1. Susan says

    January 19, 2016 at 8:23 am

    You poor thing. This January has been the worst. So many people I know seem to be having an awful time of it right now. Flit about in your crazy lady skirt until it is all over. Hope your Mum is OK. xxxx

    Reply
  2. Laura says

    January 19, 2016 at 8:32 am

    Oh fuck. That is some shit of a week right there. So sorry about it all, but in particular your Mum. FWIW I think the crazy Carrie Bradshaw tutu looks awesome on you – and whatever gets you through the day, right? Wear it to Waitrose with sunglasses and give no fucks, I say. I wish I could pull it off, alas I am not properly thin or hipless. *wails*

    Reply
  3. Cindy says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:01 am

    We have all been ill in a kind of relay for the last 6 weeks, it is miserable, without everything else on top. I hope your Mum isn’t too shaken up by it all and it’s sorted quickly for her. I actually really like this! But that could be my 20% speaking.

    Reply
  4. ianebrice says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:04 am

    I’m really sorry to read all that – especially about your mother. I hope she’ll be okay. x

    Reply
  5. f1kate says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:10 am

    Sounds like a ghastly weekend!

    For the piercing, the easiest way to help an angry one is with a tissue, a pinch of sugar, and a bit of water. Fold tissue paper (loo roll is fine) into a square that can cover both sides of the piercing if taped into place. Put a few drops of water on the paper so it’s damp enough that sugar will stick to it but with no risk of tearing through. Add pinch of sugar, fold paper over piercing and secure. Leave for several hours (overnight if possible) and through the magic of osmosis the sugar will have pulled all the gak out of the piercing. Rinse with water and repeat a couple of times if needed over subsequent days. You’ll know if it’s needed if it’s still tender, red, or gakky.

    It’s not easy to secure over an ear, but it’s the least irritating way of fixing an angry piercing I’ve ever run into, and I say that as the grown-up version of a goth who once had 42 of the buggers…

    Reply
  6. dickiegirl says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:13 am

    So sorry to hear this, my father had a heart attack almost 3 years ago (fit and healthy, had the attack in the gym of all places!) Anyway, a few stents and some bypass surgery later and he’s a new man. Medicine is brilliant. Love the skirt, wear it and feel fabulous. Hope things pick up from here for you all xx

    Reply
  7. Kathy says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:16 am

    That all sounds ghastly, especially your poor mum and I hope she gets better soon. On the other hand the skirt looks wicked on you. Wear it out and proud and a bit mad if you like. It’ll all be ok in the end. Xx

    Reply
  8. thestarter1978 says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:20 am

    Oh keep the skirt – it isn’t expensive.

    Sorry to hear that you’re having such a terrible time. Hope your mum gets better soon.

    Reply
  9. Sue Madelin says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:22 am

    Wow! That was a shit weekend. Hope your mum and your friend’s child are better soon. And for what it’s worth I think you look properly fabulous in that outfit. Definitely keep the skirt and wear it EVERYDAY! 😃

    Reply
  10. waternymph88 says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:30 am

    Love the outfit.

    Fingers crossed that your Mum will recover and be out of hospital soon xxx

    Reply
  11. QuarterFrench says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:46 am

    You always make me laugh..

    I’m sure your Mother will be fine..

    Reply
  12. annettehardysblog says

    January 19, 2016 at 9:57 am

    Poor you. Never been ill as often as I was when my children were small. Hope your mother’s okay. x

    Reply
  13. Mama says

    January 19, 2016 at 10:11 am

    You win the shittest wank weekend award. How awful. Why do the worst things always happen when you feel horrific too? Hope you rally soon and get to speak to your Mum on the phone if nothing else. I’ll be thinking of her xx

    Reply
  14. Mama says

    January 19, 2016 at 10:12 am

    PS keep the skirt, it looks incredible!! xx

    Reply
  15. thatgirlcath says

    January 19, 2016 at 10:21 am

    Get well soon to all of you. January can do one xx

    Reply
  16. Jo says

    January 19, 2016 at 10:42 am

    My Aunty just had a heart thing and had a stent put in. She feels so much better. My father in law also had a quadruple bypass 8 yrs ago and he’s doing great too. Not fun to wait through but medicine is amazing these days.
    Love the tulle skirt, looks fab on you. xx

    Reply
  17. MJ says

    January 19, 2016 at 10:59 am

    Sending love and prayers for healing for everyone.
    MJ

    Reply
  18. Caroline Horlock says

    January 19, 2016 at 11:15 am

    Hope your mum makes a speedy recovery and that you feel better soon. We are also on a constant round of colds and coughs at the moment and it’s really starting to get us down. Keep the skirt – you can totally carry it off.

    Reply
  19. jane says

    January 19, 2016 at 11:41 am

    What a horrible week. Hope your mum makes a full recovery and you are feeling better too soon. In the meantime enjoy the tutu skirt!

    Reply
  20. Sarah says

    January 19, 2016 at 11:58 am

    Hope your Mum ok x Also love the skirt looks great

    Reply
  21. Saragh says

    January 19, 2016 at 12:56 pm

    Hey, you look amazing in the tulle skirt. Shoes, tights and coat much better than the lady wearing it on the Rare website. You have to wear it on the school run, pleeeease! x

    Reply
  22. Sophie says

    January 19, 2016 at 12:59 pm

    All of you, get well soon.

    I think the general consensus is definitely to keep the skirt – even if you only wear it once, think how much Kitty will love it when she’s older, for dressing up (or just dressing!). Or, in this world of equal opportunities, how much Sam will love it …

    Reply
  23. Charlotte says

    January 19, 2016 at 1:23 pm

    That is awful about your mum. Hope she is fit & well again soon. I think there is something about this month – lots of people that I know/ know of have had absolutely crappy things happen to them in the last few weeks. If it’s any consolation (probably not but do feel some solidarity with you) we spent the best part of the weekend in a hospital getting my 3 year old’s forehead stitched back together under general anaesthetic. He was miserable, didn’t understand why I wouldn’t let him eat anything all day and why he had to miss out on playing in the snow. Skirt looks fab though…

    Reply
  24. vj says

    January 19, 2016 at 8:27 pm

    Tea tree oil is ace for infected or sore piercings. The skirt and coat combo is fab.

    Reply
  25. Mary says

    January 19, 2016 at 8:36 pm

    http://media.tumblr.com/3d04606f618e061ce3ea26793f1c8d87/tumblr_inline_mstaepWumE1qz4rgp.gif

    Reply
  26. Mary says

    January 19, 2016 at 8:39 pm

    By the way, the previous comment was meant to be encouraging…sometimes you just turn into a shittier side of yourself. Things will get better. Praying for you all.

    Reply
  27. Bex says

    January 19, 2016 at 8:46 pm

    As always you look utterly, utterly fab – I adore the skirt and coat together. I couldn’t pull it off, having more than my fair share of hips, bum and run, but if I could I would so be doing this. PS Are those Kitty’s etchings on the wall behind you?! Hope you all feel better soon.

    Reply
  28. Bex says

    January 19, 2016 at 8:48 pm

    Stupid autocorrect amended ‘tum’ to ‘run’ in my last comment. OHTHEIRONY.

    Reply
  29. Leona says

    January 19, 2016 at 8:57 pm

    Oh no. What a massive horrible brown turd of a week. Ultra crappy all round. I hope you all (and especially your mum) are lots better soon. Chin up.

    Also, your skirt is a thing of gorgeousness! I was just looking at a similar outfit on Pinterest but with a slightly less floofy skirt. So nice.

    I can’t bear it about skinny jeans. I *know* they’re over, in my head, but my heart is unwilling.

    Reply
  30. snpulling says

    January 20, 2016 at 1:06 am

    I think you look great in the skirt, but if you don’t feel great wearing it, then get rid of it. If your closet resembles mine, you need the space. I’m really sorry about your shit week, especially your mom. You’re right that she will be fine. Modern med. will do the trick, but it is difficult to be far away when someone you love is not well. Be well:)

    Reply
  31. SimplySarahLou says

    January 21, 2016 at 2:50 pm

    Keep the skirt it looks awesome. Wear it around the house doing something mundane as an instant cheer-up if it feels too Mad Lady to wear outside………………..

    Reply
  32. Charlotte says

    January 22, 2016 at 9:26 pm

    Oh good grief 😩 I’m sorry about your rubbish week. I hope your Mum is getting better. I do like the skirt – I’ve been tempted to get one for a while but if you don’t feel right in it send it back. I hope this week has been an improvement & take care

    Reply

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