The Spike

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Scenes from home

18.10pm, Kentish Town

SAM: I want my bootster

ME: Your what?

SAM: My bootster! My boomser!

ME: Your boomser? What are you on about? I’ve got no idea what you want.

SAM: *desperately* MY BOOOOOSTNER! MY BOOTSER! MY BOOOOOONSTER!

ME: Kitty have you got any idea what he’s on about?

Kitty: No

SAM: It’s my sing, which has duh… sing, which goes… roun’ and roun’ and… it’s duh… singy…

ME: Seriously Sam I’ve had enough of this, I don’t know what you’re talking about.

SAM: Hang on maybe s’in my room. *thud thud thud thud thud…. thud thud thud thud* HEWE tis!!! I got iiit MUMMAY!

ME: Oh your Vroomster!

SAM: Yeah my VROOMSTER. Can I take it inna barf?

ME: No it’s got batteries it will break

screen-shot-2017-01-30-at-21-13-35

It reminds me of the time Sam spent five minutes trying to tell me that the new guinea pig at nursery was called “FUDS” (fudge). Poor little boy, can barely make himself understood. No wonder he’s so pissed off all the time.

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Comments

  1. Cindy says

    January 31, 2017 at 8:35 am

    This reminds me of the time I asked my daughter what she wanted for dinner and thought she was saying chocolate when in fact it was, quite reasonably, sausages.

    “Chocolate?” I kept repeating at her like a bozo.
    “No ososach!!!! Ososach!!!! With Broccoli and carrots!!!”

    It went on and on as she got increasingly and understandably angry with me.

    Reply
  2. Natalie says

    January 31, 2017 at 8:52 am

    Haha. Once my nephew had a period of a few months of constantly asking to go to Tunnels, no one could figure it out. Then one day my sister asked if he wanted to go to McDonalds for a treat for something or other. He was like YES TUNNELS!!!!!!

    Reply
  3. QuarterFrench says

    January 31, 2017 at 9:31 am

    Ah so sweet…

    Reply
  4. Jane b says

    January 31, 2017 at 10:07 am

    Have you checked his hearing? My son kept misprouncing things but he was just repeating how he heard them because he had glue ear.

    Reply
    • esthermcoren says

      January 31, 2017 at 12:04 pm

      Hi Jane – his hearing is fine but he IS a bit bunged up at the moment with a cold, and has historical problems with adenoids. PLUS, he’s got one of those pudgy faces and a lisp so finds some pronunciations tricky, to our endless amusement

      Reply
  5. lovechiclikecheap says

    January 31, 2017 at 1:34 pm

    Oh so sweet. My 3yo boy exactly the same. My favourite at the moment is “durls” “durls” as he chases after completely articulate girls. Also who new the Go Jeffers had a car. I am always so distracted by the one with a moustache.

    Reply
  6. Rachel says

    January 31, 2017 at 2:09 pm

    I knew exactly what he meant from the first line. Go Jetters are currently taking up a little too much space in my head.

    Reply
  7. Sharon says

    January 31, 2017 at 2:27 pm

    Paediatric speech and language therapist here……………it not uncommon for a pre-schooler to use a short sound /b/ for a long sound /v/ and to reduce a blend, /b/ for /vr/. Sam can copy when you give him a good model and he’s motivated, e.g. really trying to get you to understand………..carry on!

    Reply
    • esthermcoren says

      January 31, 2017 at 3:14 pm

      Thanks Sharon! I’ve had a lot of stories about problems with “sausages” which is sad as they’re are so popular with pre-schoolers

      Reply
  8. Sharon says

    January 31, 2017 at 5:39 pm

    I think it’s good for children to hear these words, even if they can’t say them as yet!

    Reply
  9. Elena says

    February 1, 2017 at 11:00 am

    Whilst toilet training, my son said: “I did a wee in the toilet and grandpa crapped”. We didn’t understand and didn’t understand and he got crosser and crosser and more frustrated. Eventually, through hot and angry teas, he stamped and said “grandpa crapped” and demonstrated what he meant, by bringing his hands together and clapping.

    Reply
  10. Elena says

    February 1, 2017 at 11:01 am

    I meant tears not teas.

    Reply
  11. natalietiernan says

    February 1, 2017 at 7:13 pm

    I was reading this going ‘Vroomster! It’s the bloody vroomster.’
    Now this is nothing against you, I only know this because I’ve had the SAME BLOODY CONVERSATION with my four year old where I was sat going ‘Whaaaaat the fuuuuuck are you talking about?!’ Funky fact! 🦄

    Reply
  12. Sharon says

    February 1, 2017 at 8:51 pm

    Side bar, I’ve started watching “Further back in time for dinner”…………..Giles looks gorgeous!!!!

    Reply
    • esthermcoren says

      February 2, 2017 at 8:56 am

      Tjhanks Sharon! I will tell him, he will be really pleased x

      Reply
  13. BY says

    February 8, 2017 at 4:53 pm

    haha, I made a mistake showing the photo of the vroomster to my 3 yr old and now he has taken to telling me “I want my brumster” every evening, it’s hilarious. and I guess I’d better order it right now.

    Reply

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