Sam isn’t well – intermittent fever, strange blotchy face rash, swollen tonsils, slushy tummy. Plus a really grim symptom, which is that he wakes up in the middle of the night e.g. at 3am seemingly for no reason (not in pain etc) and then doesn’t go back to sleep. At all.

So right at this very moment when I ought to be Haw Hawing around the brand new flagship Trotters shop in High Street Kensington, and perhaps afterwards having a gossipy lunch with some lovely girl from the Daily Mail, I am cleaning up diarrhoea off the bathroom floor from where Sam did a fart and then kept going.

But I’ve got Trotters on the mind now and it’s worth reminding you that they do these really posh, cute and delightful little summer plimsolls called Hampton Canvas for kids. If you are into that kind of thing you can buy yourself a matching pair – they have a selection of matching adults and kids shoes called Mummy & Me *dies*. (Or just buy yourself some and let the kids go barefoot.)

These will be very low in stock by mid-June so, you know, don’t dawdle.