You know what I think? I think you should send the dress you wore to all the parties last year to the goddamn dry cleaners and just wear it again this year. Okay? No-one will notice or know. I have worn the same dress to all my Christmas and New Year parties for the last four years.
If it’s good enough for me it’s good enough for you!
Right. Done. Bye.
Or, if your old dresses are really just sad, mad and bad and you need to change up, just out of respect for the people who have to look at you, pull up a chair, my friend. Let’s talk.
First of all, your Christmas party outfit doesn’t need to be a dress. It only really needs to be black trousers or jeans and a spangly shirt like this one. Or The Outnet is always good for something mad.
Don’t, if you can help it, wear court shoes. Unless they are incredibly splendid vertiginous Louboutin things. I mean, don’t chuck them out but just for the moment they are not okay. Consider some ruched black pointy ankle boots – Mint Velvet make the best ones. Or frankly trainers would be better than court shoes. I love these glittery ones from John Lewis. I can’t explain why court shoes are having a bad PR moment right now, they just are. Maybe it’s Meghan in her weird cloppity too-big granny shoes that’s done it.
Or how about some velvet jeans? I tried on a whole load the other day out of curiosity and Paige have a very gorgeous pair. I am a large size 10 and the 28 waist ones fit me. But I’m afraid they are £240. John Lewis do a very good dupe for only £59 but they do not have the stretch and swagger of the Paige ones. Size down (on the JLP ones).
(By the way I saw a woman the other day wearing black velvet jeans and smart climbing boots, a white t-shirt and a khaki shacket and she looked AMAZING – so they’re not just for parties.)
If you absolutely have to do a dress, I thought this one from Finery was rather beautiful, but if a dress doesn’t have a pattern it can sometimes be a bit unforgiving around the middle.
If you want something LOUD, this by Mint Velvet is good. It has the advantage that they have thoughtfully backed the usually hellishly itchy sequin with a very soft jersey fabric so you will be comfortable, which you almost never are in anything with even a single sequin on it.
A lot of people will be doing long skirts with tall boots this year – the Seventies are still very much with us – [Corbyn joke here? Or is that too shrill…] – and there are a lot of good knife-pleats around. I really fancy this dress from All Saints, which you can put a fine knit or a chunky cropped sweater over the top OR a clingy black polo underneath. Kettlewell colours do a good silky jersey polo – size up (I am size L in this).
As for tall boots, they are flipping everywhere at the moment – but if you want a specific recommendation I tried this pair on from M&S at a shoot recently and was impressed. They are available in half sizes and I would say if in doubt go half a size up (eg my feet are precisely 37.5 and I take a 38 in these.)
I have just, (because my old Christmas party dress is actually falling to bits and pretty disgusting), bought myself this from Me + Em. Like everything from Me + Em it is incredibly flattering and well-made. It very cleverly has pockets more towards the front of the dress so they don’t add unnecessary bulk to the hip area. I will be wearing this non-stop from the 4th December to New Year’s Eve. I don’t even know why I am slightly excited?! I hate parties! (But I do love alcohol.)
A word about tights and pants. Last year during a conversation about something else a friend revealed that she sometimes wears tights without pants. Now, I am a massive, massive prude (as you may have long suspected). I’d rather die than talk about sex or bodily… anything… and I would never, ever wear tights without pants and I was horrified that she would go COMMANDO and I put it down to her being a crazy posh girl with loose morals.
And then I bought myself the most monstrously sexy long clinging skirt, (when drunk probably,) and couldn’t find a pant that didn’t ruin the entire ensemble. I remembered the words of my friend and wore it with tights with no pants. And it was fine! A little… weird, but fine! My lingerie of preference would always include some sort of knicker, but if you have accidentally bought a dress or skirt that you love that you can’t wear with pants, wear tights without pants. There is a cotton gusset. It’s fine.
I bought a gold sequin shift dress (lovely kind of burnished matt sequins, not horribly shiny ones) from M&S in about 2007 and have worn it for basically every Christmas (and NYE) party since. But ONLY at Christmas. It’s quite nice not having to think about it at all. And weirdly the shape has never dated.
I just bought this from Zara: https://www.zara.com/uk/en/knit-dress-with-organza-sleeves-p02488137.html?v1=31409977&v2=1121004 it’s possibly a bit out there, but I find it really flattering (buffet dress!), gothy in a French way and I am going to wear with ankle boots or high pointy black heels and red lipstick. Also at £50 it feels like a steal.
That’s gorgeous!
Oh I *love* that dress. The sleeves are like wispy ethereal clouds
I’m really, really sad about the court shoes thing. I have orange suede high courts that I wear with everything for parties. And I’m really short, so ankle boots and strappy sandals don’t work.
On a happier note, I have a massive family wedding at New Year so am completely here for all Christmas party dressing ideas.
oh yeah god wear the courts. I talk shit x
Tights-no-knickers is frankly, the only option with anything clingy.
So sad about courts… but they’ll be back! They’ll outlast MM for sure. Also, I just replaced my black ones from LK Bennett (my hatches/matches/dispatches pair) so dammit I will wear them.
?smart climbing boots? for example?
eg. Grenson x
For sparkly trainers I can whole-heartedly recommend a browse through the kids section at Next – they go up to an adult size 7 in some styles. I’m currently wearing these to almost daily adoration from randoms in the street https://www.next.co.uk/g83366s10#926845 and they are cheap as chips.
“82 people have looked at these in the last few hours”. I kid you not!
Hannah B are you my sister Hannah B or a different Hannah B. it’s really confusing
I’m a different Hannah B. Sorry I can change my name on here if better!
no no not at all! just needed to get my head in the right place
I am peevish because I bought a silver skirt last year for a party I couldn’t attend in the end, and now the only Christmas party I was invited to that would have been suitable for silver faux snakeskin has been cancelled … Might have to troll around Waitrose looking ridic instead.
For shoes I would never even think of going into Monsoon but i got these last year in a dark green and they are amazing as you can wear with black opaque tights. My biggest fear is being over dressed, I am terrified of being LOOKED AT or NOTICED and I’m the kind of person who wears trainers underneath my full length dresses as I cannot bear the thought of being unable to run for the loo or a bus, but these are brilliant and just the right side of dressy. https://uk.monsoon.co.uk/view/product/uk_catalog/mon_1,mon_23,mon_1.16/7514716139
Laura, those are pretty. I love the colour
Thank you Esther, my Christmas dressing is now sorted. And you do make me laugh. What should one put on one’s feet with the Me and Em dress and are we talking opaques or tanned legs?….
OPAQUES and black suede boots (I’ve got short legs so need all the tricks)
Im going to a ‘do’ in a large smart apartment where you have to take your shoes off at the door. I’m really short, most others are tall, I rely on heeled ankle boots for a semblance of normality.
I only know the people slightly, so small talk. Buffet with full size plates and glasses, no where to sit.
Your basic nightmare. I cannot refuse.
what the actual fuck. take those blue plastic bootie bag things and put them on over your shoes. I mean what a psycho
I shall be drinking before, during, after.
Have something substantial beforehand (a lovely LARGE greasy cheeseburger even), put buffet food on a napkin and drink ALL the booze. Who doles our large plates for a buffet with nowhere to sit?!
Or you could do what a friend of mine does and take a camping chair with you!! (I kid you not! And she is so unapologetic about it as well!) Eventually your hosts will take the hint.
Some heroes don’t wear capes.😍
I bought this Zara slip dress in the summer – https://www.zara.com/uk/en/slip-dress-with-straps-p01165156.html?v1=18896589&v2=1143013 and plan to wear it with a slouchy cardigan and either trainers or clumpy boots… Last year I bought something very similar to this – https://www.zara.com/uk/en/velvet-dress-p02878902.html?v1=22284221&v2=1282592 and wore spanx and red lipstick and felt fab – even though I am 46 and dear god the mid life spread is upon me. Spanx really saves the day. I think with parties – a double g and T, good lipstick and forgiving lighting and you can get through them. Just don’t spend all night by the free-pouring bar, then fall in a privet hedge, flail like a beetle, before being rescued by a Dad you don’t even find attractive and then deciding you are in fact Beyonce and dirty dancing with him until your husband drags you home. Sigh.
this is like an entire play all on its own
I love this. It’s my ideal party scenario
YES to Spanx! I would never go knickerless anywhere!!! 🤮
And I wear knickers under them and that works for me. Thanks for the Zara slip dress reminder, RummyMummy! I have a floor length slip dress just like that from Whistles that I wore to my school leavers’ ball back in ‘99. I still have it and have not worn it since university! Time to get the scissors out!
Salivating over those ruched pointy ankle boots 🤤🤤👍
I go a bit mad at Christmas time because I just adore sequins and glitter and stuff. And it’s the only time of year I feel you can really spangle yourself up with impunity. I have this dress: https://www.warehouse.co.uk/gb/clothing/dresses/foil-polka-dot-mini-dress/036404.html?dwvar_036404_color=90&cgid=dresses
Which is much more fitted and less sack-y than it looks there. Aren’t there a lot of black dresses with gold foil dots or feathers around just now? Every shop has at least one version. I’m planning to wear it with either black Topshop ankle boots or these from Next, which are very comfortable. https://www.next.co.uk/g29144s4?itm=603280#603280
I’ve also got some patterned tights, which I’ve not really worn before – I had a sudden hankering for like 15 denier ones with small dots, which I found in Next, and I bought some fishnets from Snag as well. They both have the cotton gusset area, so I will definitely be wearing them sans pants, even though the sight of my bare crotch covered only by sausagey Lycra is quite alarming.
. The advice you give about wearing the same thing every year is very sound and I would gleefully follow it….BUT the elders of the family INSIST on a family photo at the party every year! You say no one will notice but what if there is photographic evidence?!
LOL! thank god I tacked a guide on the end then
Yes! What’s with Meghan’s shoes!! I read somewhere that she wears bigger shoes because of a previous bunion surgery… Whether that’s true or not, I don’t know, but she really winds me up! Lovely Kate, on the other hand, is my style inspiration for sure.
As for Corbyn… I love his policies but he often dresses like a hobo!! 😑 Thank goodness Seumas makes him wear a tie is all I can say!
Thanks for this post- it came just at the right time! I’m 20 weeks pregnant and have been trying to find a dress I like for my work Christmas Do but, and this is probably just me, I feel like a big bump just makes a dress look weird (even a maternity fit one). I was just thinking “Maybe trousers and a top?” So now I am fully decided on that 🙂
And I have lovely gold sparkly Superga trainers which I think are the only shoes I’ve ever been complimented on so I’m with you on that too!
Managed to get a deep red pair of the Paige jeans on eBay BNWT for the price of the JL ones. I was sucked in by your description of them having swagger: i seem to be dressing more and more like a highwayman by the day (bagged a gorgeous Alexander McQueen jacket on Vestiaire which started this look) which is probably not the best look given my rower’s shoulders. Thank you! If you’re in Wiltshire, don’t worry about your money or your life, it’s probably just me.
PRINCE char-MING